 |
| My beloved mom |
It is Wednesday, 12th of August 2015 and it is 08:33 AM now, in Malaysia. I woke up in the middle of my sleeping, with tears falling through the small openings at the inner corners of the eyelids near the nose. I wonder what was I thinking about while I was sleeping. Then, random images of my late mom & myself pop up in my mind. The picture on the top of my journal is one of the images that has been on my mind for like 7 hours ago. I don't know why it came out suddenly, but probably because I missed her so much. It has been almost 6 months since she left my sister & I. Oh I wish you were here through our thick & thin, the struggles to at least moved on from crying over you has made me became even a stronger person. I am not as strong as I am now, if someone did not helped me get through all of these things, because I am pretty sure I won't be able to go out and show my silly ugly face crying. I thought there is no one could ever understands me like you do. But I was wrong, totally wrong. She is one of my senior at the college, the one that is so spontaneous in everything. She is the bravest person I've ever met, the person that can lead me through anything without bothering my bloody selfishness attitude. I was so surprised that she is able to control me and changed me into good. I am so lucky to know her, as a senior, a friend and an adopted sister. But it saddens me that you have never at least met her before you go. She is so rare to compare all of my friends. She is priceless, same as you are, mom. I don't get why did the both of you met for at least once. But what can I do? You are gone forever, I want to let you know that I am safe here, with her. I have stayed at her house for almost a month now. It is fun to leave with her family, I never thought that her parents would actually adopt me as her little sister one day. 2 weeks ago, her parents declared me as her adopted little sister. I am so happy to finally have a 'new' parents. The only point I want to point out is I wish you were here, with us, talking and laughing like you used to do before. I missed you so much, I am like living in a hell without you here beside me. But Alhamdulillah, I have found the new you, oh wait. No, the 2nd of you now. I am pretty sure, she will take care of me like the way you take care of me. I love you